Relaxing into Reality

Breaking up is not hard to do

2010-01-01T17:19:00.000-08:00

Why hello 2010...how are you doing?? I've been waiting for you...

Oh, 2009, don't get me wrong - I loved you. You have great qualities and we shared many wonderful times. We welcomed out third precious baby, I turned 30 and we sold our home during our time together. But, 2009, you really threw me for a loop when you decided to do all of that stuff at about the same time. Did you have to bring all the craziness all at once? That's just not how you should treat people. I don't know if you were not up for doing much when we first met. Maybe you were just too busy messing around with other people and not ready to commit or I was just not sure what I wanted to do the first half of our time together, but really? Did you have to plan everything at the same time? Plus, the house thing falling through after dragging out for so long - that just wasn't cool. Like I said, you have many wonderful things going for you, but I think our relationship has run its course. I could say its not you, its me, but I need to be honest - its you. We're done and I'm moving on. 2010 might not be the year of my dreams, but it has lots of promise. I'm walking away with some wonderful memories, 2009, and for that I'm grateful but I'm not sorry to see you go.

Bring it on, 2010!!!

Swimsuit Season!

2009-12-20T20:05:00.000-08:00

Now that winter is in full swing, we've decided that we're going to combat cabin fever by getting a family membership to the Y. We're lucky enough to get a discount through Ernie's work, so that eliminates my natural desire to fret about how much we're spending on this, etc., etc. (Yay!). One of the main reasons we want to join is to be able to go to the indoor pool and take swim lessons with the kiddos. This is the part that has given me something to fret about...and its not about the kids and their safety near/in the water. Its about getting a swimsuit.

The last time I bought a swimsuit was right after I had Xavier, which was 3 1/2 years ago. I bought what I like to think of as my first "adult" swimsuit. Before then, I pretty much wore bikinis. Not so much now. I can still appreciate bikinis, just not on me. Don't get me wrong - I'm not someone who has a complex with my weight or how I look. I'm pretty secure in that area, but at the same time I'm not about to show "that area" to every else like I did before life changed and now there are three kids with me whenever I am at the beach/pool.

And that leads me to the big reason why I need an "adult" swimsuit. Kids like to grab, pull, run, pull, grab, spaz, yell, climb, grab, push and pull. Did I mention grabbing and pulling? This grabbing and pulling can involve anything, but often it involves some part of me or my clothes. So, I need to make sure that what I have on is "grab and pull-proof". Not only that, but there is other new criteria that I have for my future swimsuit:
-I have to be able to run in it without it creeping up my butt
-I have to be able to slide down a water slide without it disappearing up my butt
-Probably should be a one-piece, but I'll try a tank-ini
-My boobs must be covered and not at risk of falling out or being exposed by kid hands that like to grab and pull
-It can't make me look as pasty white as I really am
-I must be able to carry at least two children while wearing it and it must stay in place
-I need to be able to eat while wearing it, but not feel like everyone can tell that I just ate - that's always important
-AND it needs to be super cute

Does this swimsuit exist?? I'm going to try to find out...wish me luck!

Do you have anything that you're searching for that might not exist??

2009-12-09T19:27:00.000-08:00

I was really hoping to do this more often...oops. Anyway, just a quick little note about the Christmas-ing that's been going on here. In case you didn't know, I'm super cheap. BUT, I also happen to believe that this pushes me to be more creative when it comes to things like decorating. It stresses me out to think about spending money on decorations that are only going to be out for a month at the most. Plus most things that are super cute are guaranteed to be destroyed within 30 seconds at the hands of one or both of the my kids that are mobile (The baby has yet to destroy anything except my previously almost stretch mark-free stomach). This year, I found some inspiration on two shopping bags - one from Pottery Barn and one from Old Navy. (Side note: there's a good chance that the PB bag was from the first half of this decade because I found it hidden away in my Grandparent's stash of gift bags up in rarely used bedroom at their house.) They both had some pretty holiday graphics on them that I cut out and framed. I've displayed them for all to see...that is if you're here late at night if/when everything is cleaned up or early in the morning before the house is destroyed. Anyway...here's my attempt at decorating for Christmas:

If you look behind the Thomas the Train backpack you can clearly see the framed pieces from the Pottery Barn bag. The other graphics that I framed are safely and clearly displayed up high on top of the built-ins. See it? Right behind that light fixture. That black frame up there. Lovely huh?? So worth it...

ps - that's a super sweet fort in the background that could also be a called a boat depending on your mood. And, yes, I do fit in it.

Wow! Its been a looong time...

2009-11-02T19:25:00.000-08:00

I don't even know where to start...maybe with a "HOLY CRAP I HAVEN'T HAD TIME TO WRITE FOR ALMOST 6 MONTHS!!!!!". I can't believe its been that long since I've had time to sit down and share a few thoughts. Actually, if I'm being honest its because I really haven't had a coherent stream of thoughts since I was 8 months pregnant. Those of you reading this know that I birthed our third child almost exactly 4 months ago - our sweet and calm big/little guy, Knox. Seriously, I sometimes want to smoosh his cheeks and munch on him because he is so darn cute. But I digress as I attempt to steer away from gushing about my adorable baby... You'd think that because this baby is pretty much the easiest baby ever that I'd be able to bounce right back into things and get my act together as usual. Ummm...no. This whole third child thing has thrown me for a loop! And its not the baby that's been my un-doing - its the other two. What gets me is that they absolutely love him - which, again, makes one think that it wouldn't be so bad. Ummm...no. Although there is harmony between the siblings, craziness has been unleashed at a whole new level around here. I'm talking toilet water drinking, poop smearing, throwing a fit outside in just underwear kinda fun. Its so crazy that I cannot remember what has happened one day to the next. My mind just blanks out now. I'm starting to wonder if its a self-preservation type thing that my brain has unconsciously resorted to. What I'm getting at here is that I have no idea what I'm doing most of the time and I'm not even sure that I'm able to fully function in situations that require more than just a reaction. Oh well. Right now, I'm just pretty dang happy that I've carved out a few minutes to share this. Oh - and I'm happy to finally be wearing some normal clothes again. Although, I do love a good pair of sweat pants with an elastic waist band still!

Moms say the darnedest things!

2009-05-09T19:40:00.000-07:00

The other day Xavier and I were sitting together on our recliner when he looked up at me and said "Here ya' go Mommy!" while holding out his finger. On it was a gigantic booger. You know what my response was? I showed no signs of being repulsed at all. Instead, I replied, "No thank you. I don't want your booger." in a very sweet, mommy-like tone. I've been thinking about this little exchange and I've come to realize that I may have lost my mind - I actually said "thank you" when referring to the offering of a booger! If I had accepted it, would I still have thanked him? (Why, thank you sweetie! Momma loves boogers!) What has come over me that I'm so focused on teaching manners to my child that I've suppressed all rational responses in order to model simple phrases like "please" and "thank you"? The things I find myself doing and saying all in the name of politeness are down right crazy. I may be missing the point here and running the risk that my son is going to be shocked when someone is appalled when he tries to share his boogers with them. Anyway, potential damage to my son's social skills aside I've kept track of some of the ridiculous things I've said lately that I'm sure many moms have found themselves saying. For those who are not mothers, these phrases will do two things: 1) totally gross you out and 2) prepare you for motherhood/babysitting/being an aunt or whatever.

Here goes...

"Honey, please don't put your hands in your butt." (note the pet name combined with the super polite "please" - so effective when trying to keep your kid from having smelly butt hands)

"Please stop licking your arm honey. And, no thank you, mommy doesn't want to be licked either" (I don't even need to elaborate on this one...)

"Sorry honey, your sister does not have any poopy for you to look at." (Sorry?? Oh my gosh... how about instead I try "You don't need to look at your sister's poop! That's gross!" Maybe next time...)

Oh sweetie, please don't wipe your nose on your shirt. We use tissues to wipe our noses. (This was said multiple times. I didn't change his shirt all day and I did bring him out in public in it. This will be included on my "Mom of the Year" application.)

I'm sure there's more, but I'd like to hear some of the things you've found yourself saying to your child, so please share. If you don't have kids, take notes.

Really???

2009-04-29T18:28:00.000-07:00

Today I went to Rivertown Mall with both kiddos and it actually went quite well for a change. Xavier didn't tackle any girls at the treehouse, Zoe stayed dry and I didn't spill soup from Panera Bread all over me - it was a good time. Because of this, I was able to actually pay attention to my surroundings and I happened to notice the most ridiculous Mother's Day advertisement I have ever seen. Victoria's Secret has a GIANT poster up in their first floor window of a "woman" (she can't be more than 19) in a light pink bra. The photo is of her basically from the boobs up - gotta make sure that the boobs are a major focus being V.S. and all. Then, scrolled across the poster and thus the model are the words "Love you Mom" (or something close to that). REALLY??? Ok, first of all, ewww. I don't even need to elaborate on how weird that would be to wish your Mom a happy Mother's Day clad only in a bra and panties ("Happy Mother's Day from me and my boobs! - Love you Mom!") . Second, who is their target market here??? I seriously have no idea who they are trying to reach with this one. I'm a young mom, yet I know that I do not, I repeat, DO NOT want my children (or my husband) getting me a bra for Mother's Day. Nor do I want my son to someday walk by an ad like this and think "Hey - that's a great gift idea for my Mom!" They can go ahead and pick me up some lotion or comfy pajamas from Victoria's Secret, but those items were definately not featured in this ad. Lastly, I'm really starting to think that their window ads aren't much more than just pictures of almost completely naked women meant to shock us into paying attention to them rather than display their products. I'm assuming its because I am a mom now that I actually take notice of these things, which I suppose is part of the job description. Whatever... I'm just going make sure that my kids don't grow up thinking is appropriate to purchase bras and panties for me EVER, Mother's Day or not.

Not exactly how I pictured it...

2009-04-27T19:41:00.000-07:00

Anyone who knows Ernie and me, knows that we have been remodeling our house since day one. There is not inch of wall that we have not painted and there are even some rooms we've redone twice in the last 6 1/2 years - I'm still dizzy from the paint fumes that my kitchen walls are emitting from last week (my not so secret desire to be super eco-friendly has yet to surpass our ability to afford such luxuries as low/no VCO paint that washes off with water and you could probably use to water your plants or something). Anyway, every time we redo a room I have this wonderful vision in my head or how its going to turn out. In that vision, it is ALWAYS exceptionally clean and organized. Everything has a place and everything is in its place. Why I continue to dream this dream, I don't know. You'd think that I would have realized by now that its just not going to happen. Now I could launch into an update on our kitchen, but I'm feeling pretty happy about it right now...give me a couple of months and I'll find something wrong with it (another character flaw that I plan on addressing eventually). The room that troubles me the most is our wonderful playroom.

Seriously, we are pretty dang lucky to have a playroom first of all. Its in the basement, way in the back and I don't have to worry about finding a place for toys that are ridiculously large and most likely hardly ever used. I think that we completed this room shortly after or around the time that Xavier was born. It was first supposed to be a workout/playroom, but who am I kidding? The treadmill hasn't been unfolded since 2007 and my workout videos sit on the shelf. Here's the thing though, I think that I can partially blame this on the kids (I'm all over this anytime I can do this). I make sure that we do not have an insane amount of toys and we've set up that room so that all the toys have a place. Problem is that they never seem to get to that place and its totally because of the kids!

I once pictured that our perfectly organized playroom would be neat and tidy at the end of everyday because of our great storage system that we set up - it really is easy to pick that room up, yet this is what it looks like 90% of the time the kids are OUT of the room:

See those blocks? There's a pile of cars near them and today I bought some bins in the hopes that they could contain the blocks and cars better than the folded up and mashed canvas bins that are currently in use.

Next, we have the train table. I imagined Xavier playing at the table for hours on end pushing his little trains back and forth while I get some time upstairs to cook dinner or vacuum (ha!). Here's the current state of the train table:

Uno anyone? How about we just sit down for a nice sippy cup of day old chocolate milk that I just realized was left down there? Mmmmm.... Notice the one, sad train on the table that has lost his track. He has nowhere to go because the pieces of track have now become table hockey sticks.

Just for fun, here's a look at the library of workout videos we own that are housed near the Disney & Muppet VHS tapes (yes, we totally still have VHS tapes and I know you're jealous of the Muppet collection)...

The only workout done in this room is by me trying to see how quickly I can pull up the Sesame Street recordings on our DVR and then run out of the room.

Last, but not least, you must meet Catcher Guy. This special little man first moved into Xavier's room, but has somehow relocated to the playroom. He's meant to catch baseballs pitched to him by our little guy, but now he's mostly a wrestling opponent for both kids:

I highly recommend buying a Catcher Guy not just because its fun for the kids, but because its hilarious to hide it around the house for your unsuspecting spouse to find late at night (like in the closet or under some blankets). Its even better it your can get it to somehow leap out or fall onto whomever you're trying freak out. Seriously funny...

You know, overall I really am happy with this messy room of ours. The kids like it, I really don't worry anymore about it being clean when people come over because most of the time they come with their kids and its going to get messed up anyway. I may have envisioned a gloriously tidy romper room with room to spare for arts and crafts and kids peacefully playing together, but I know better now. Every once in a while we pick it up and try to teach Xavier how to put things away and how to take care of his things (Zoe's off the hook until she learns how to walk). In the meantime, its kinda fun letting him do what he wants to do with the space we created for our kids and their friends.

What really happened...

2009-04-25T20:23:00.000-07:00

(Here's my fb post from this morning: Katie McCallum plans on trying to clean the house, organize our files, work, finishing redoing the kitchen, do some laundry, run to Target, return a pair of shoes, go to a birthday party, sew some curtains, shop on-line for various baby/kid related items, figure out how to plant my garden and juggle the kids today. I know I can fit a nap in there somewhere...

Typing out my mental to-do list was sort of an experiment for me. I wake up everyday with a list like this in my head and have begun to feel really overwhelmed by all that there is to do. So, I thought that putting it all out there and sharing (minus a few items because of space) might put things into perspective for me.

So, ok, here's what REALLY ended up happening today...

I did get some laundry done, but not folded. Not sure when I'm gong to get around to that...

The floors got swept, but not washed. This was accomplished with Zoe's help - she crawled around and ate up all the cereal she had thrown on the floor earlier. (Yes, I let my daughter eat off of our dirty floor and actually thought, "hey, this is helpful".

Some of the kitchen stuff was taken care of. By Ernie. Thank God.

I did not end up leaving the house or even changing out of my pj's. So, I missed my friends' daughter's first birthday party (and I even had the gift ready to go - this was a miracle in itself). Looks like Target and the mall will have to wait until tomorrow - or maybe sometime next week. Who knows...

One really good thing - I actually got around to doing my prenatal yoga video for the first time since becoming pregnant with this third baby (for the record, I am now 30 weeks along). This is the same video I used religiously when pregnant with crazy kid #1, then maybe 5-10 times with crazy kid #2. If I have another child, my pattern indicates that I may end up just lying in bed the entire pregnancy and not moving at all. Anyway, the only reason I ended up doing this is because my pelvis has begun to feel like a worn out hammock. The pain gets so bad that my stairs are like sand dunes to me right now. So I decided that it was time to pull out the yoga video with the crazy guru-ish lady. Maybe now I'll start to feel great like the yogi told me I should and be able to walk 5 miles a day and want to give birth in the forest to be closer to my ancestors. I'll keep you posted on that one...

After all this, I ended up passing out on the most uncomfortable piece of furniture in our house because I didn't want to move. This happened after I put Zoe down for a nap that she was not interested in taking right then. But, she was entertained by talking to herself for half an hour and we both ended up falling asleep finally.

The rest of my to-do list will have to wait and I already have many things to add to it. Hopefully, my seedlings won't wither and die before I figure out how to properly plant them outside and maybe I'll find a cheap seamstress that can finish the curtains I started to make (and by "make" I mean cut to fit, that's it). In the meantime, I'm going to practice relaxing into my reality in order to keep my sanity!